The Christmas Spirit

I liked this video reminder of what Christmas is really about:

Sometimes I feel like the odd man out because I'm not a big gift giver.  The gifts I like to give are ones that I know will last because of their thoughtfulness--pictures, letters, memories, a hand-made blanket, a purse for the friend whose mom passed away years before, 12 Days of Christmas, etc.--or that are needed and practical--church shoes, candle warmer, etc.  I would rather spend time with someone or give them shoe laces, than give them a gift that they'll use and break, throw away, or shove in a back corner (kids are excepted from this--they break toys all the time, but they still "get" the magic of Christmas giving; every gift is--or should be--exciting because it's new).

I realized that this Christmas season. I was having a difficult time getting into the gift-giving mode of Christmas and I couldn't figure out why.  Well, it's because I couldn't figure out what people closest to me needed or needed. And while I probably am still giving out some perfunctory gifts that came from someone's wish list, at least it shows that I love them, because I do.

But...

I did get some great gifts for my parents and Cody.   My parents' gift is no secret. My sister and I are paying for family pictures, since the last ones we took were when I graduated from college and Cody and Westley weren't in our family yet.  We get to do that today (hopefully, if planes arrive on time...).  And Cody's gifts...I don't want to give away any surprises, but I know that he won't be surprised by the loving practicality of some of the gifts, since I gave him shoes for church last year. However, I do know that there is at least one gift that he will be surprised by.

Thorvaldsen Christus

I'd like to close this Christmas message with a quote that I always have displayed in my room:

"However dim our days may seem, they have been a lot darker for the Savior of the world.  As a reminder of those days, Jesus has chosen, even in a resurrected, otherwise perfected body, to retain for the benefit of His disciples the wounds in His hands and in His feet and in His side--signs, if you will, that painful things happen even tot he pure and the perfect; signs, if you will, that pain in this world is not evidence that God doesn't love you; signs, if you will, that problems pass and happiness can be ours."  --Jeffrey R. Holland, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

Three to four years in five minutes

After driving around in the snow this morning and discovering that the place (where I thought for sure I would find a small gift for Cody) didn't have it, I came home and began procrastination rituals.  What am I procrastinating?  Cleaning my house (because we didn't do that Saturday; instead we saw the Desolation of Smaug), grading, planning for school, class roles for Primary, working on Janeen's potatoes for dinner, and possibly making a buche de Noel (but I'm hoping to do that tonight with Cody).

During my successful procrastination, I listened to The Nutcracker, ate a banana and a candy sled, and made name tags for all the children in Primary.  Then I decided I would look up some information on the Internet which inevitably makes me sad. I thought maybe this time it wouldn't, but it did.  After trying to cheer myself by reading happy things and having that not work, I started wasting my life on Facebook. But this time it wasn't a waste.

I became sucked into looking at pictures and after five minutes I realized that I was looking at pictures from 3 1/2 years ago.  Man alive! I thought (and I'm not joking, I really thought that) I am so blessed and lucky to have had so many opportunities the past three to four years of my life.  So here is a photo tribute to the experiences, but more importantly, the people that helped make my life so much better these past three years.

October 2009: After a life-changing hike with Lori Lund (Miller, now) and Kasey Butler. I didn't realize that long-term effects that this hike would have on my life but I frequently think about the things we talked about and the lessons we learned on that hike.  I needed my friends at this hard time in my life and they were there for me.

December 2009: at Lindsey's Ugly Sweater Party. I wish I had a better copy of the lower picture, but I think it's lost to cyberspace. Lindsey has been my friend through thick and thin, close and far, writing and phone calls. 

December 2009: Doing "See no evil,  hear no evil, speak no evil" with Ben and Jacob.  My brothers probably don't realize how much they make my day brighter, but they do.  

April 2010: My first full day in France. Sometimes that doesn't even seem real.  I learned a lot about myself when I was there. It was a good soul-cleansing and goal fulfilling trip.

May 2010: I got to spend 6 weeks in France. WHAT!? How many people get to do that? 

October 2010: This was a great group of roommates. Funny to think that we're all (except Biva) married.  I love this picture because we actually look like we could be tall or average-height people. And we are so not.

February 2011: I loved working with these ladies at Freshman Academy/Mentoring, especially traveling to Atlanta, Georgia to present at the First-Year Experience Conference.

April 2011: My partner in crime, Amanda Leifson.  So so so glad that we went to DC as a graduation present to myself.

May 2011: Verdon & Amberlee Walker gave me hope that I would find someone to love and love me back.  Verdon was one of my best friends for two years and I'm so glad that he's pursing his goals with Amberlee at his side.

August 2011: Taking engagement pictures.  Cody has changed my life and brought more happiness and laughter into my life than I deserve, but that I need.  Crazy that it has been two years.

January 2012: Parents. What would I do without them?

June 2013: My nephew, Westley.  That child is the reason I've seen my sister and brother-in-law so much the past year and a half (just kidding, sort of...haha).  I love this kid so much!

Even though life is hard, so hard, sometimes, at least I have good people around me who love me and whom I love.  I don't feel like the most faith-filled person right now, but I know I'm being supported by the faith of those stronger than I am right now. Thank you.

and Merry Christmas!

Faith

Photo I took of the Provo Temple 15 Oct 2009

This last Sunday Cody and I were asked to give talks at a nursing home that is in our stake.  Unlike most talk requests that are extended, we weren't given a topic.  At first I thought that was a little unfair because I felt like I had too much on my plate and now I needed to think up a topic for a five minute talk I'd be giving to people I didn't know the next day.

After considering my life and what message I would like to hear, and then thinking about what is a topic that would be helpful for older people who have surrendered most of their independence to the inevitability of growing old--I decided to speak on faith.

I chose this quote from Elder D. Todd Christofferson from this month's visiting teaching message:

"Faith in Jesus Christ is the conviction and assurance of (1) His status as the Only Begotten Son of God, (s) His infinite Atonement, and (3) His literal Resurrection."

My next favorite source of information is the LDS Bible Dictionary. Under faith, I chose this snippet:

"The Lord has revealed Himself and His perfect character, possessing in their fulness all the attributes of love, knowledge, justice, mercy, unchangeableness, power, and every other needful thing, so as to enable the mind of man to place confidence in Him without reservation."

The bulk of my talk was used to tell the story of my great-great grandmother Betsy Scholes Morris and her faith.  Then I closed by sharing my favorite scripture, Doctrine and Covenants 123: 17:

"Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed."

The past few days as I've been thinking about that talk and Cody's talk which followed (it was basically on having faith in trials--a shortened version of his lesson the previous week in young men's), I've considered that opportunity a blessing far greater than I could have even imagined on Sunday.

There are many things that we can have faith in--people, events, promises. However, because we are mortal and make mistakes or the events and promises we make are all traced to a human, then those people, events, and promises can fail. However, because of what Christ did for us and does for us every single day, we can have perfect faith in Him.  We can trust Him to fulfill His promises and to carry us through tough times because He has been through it.

I think there is more to faith than I get and understand. Perhaps as I go through each part of my life I will learn another little aspect of faith that will one day make my understanding more complete. For now, I guess my faith in Jesus Christ is enough to know that trials will pass, mortality is allowed to happen but He is there waiting to help us, and that there are blessings being poured on us in the midst of difficulties and that are being kept in store for us for when we walk out of the darkness of our sorrow into the brightness of His love and light.