Three to four years in five minutes

After driving around in the snow this morning and discovering that the place (where I thought for sure I would find a small gift for Cody) didn't have it, I came home and began procrastination rituals.  What am I procrastinating?  Cleaning my house (because we didn't do that Saturday; instead we saw the Desolation of Smaug), grading, planning for school, class roles for Primary, working on Janeen's potatoes for dinner, and possibly making a buche de Noel (but I'm hoping to do that tonight with Cody).

During my successful procrastination, I listened to The Nutcracker, ate a banana and a candy sled, and made name tags for all the children in Primary.  Then I decided I would look up some information on the Internet which inevitably makes me sad. I thought maybe this time it wouldn't, but it did.  After trying to cheer myself by reading happy things and having that not work, I started wasting my life on Facebook. But this time it wasn't a waste.

I became sucked into looking at pictures and after five minutes I realized that I was looking at pictures from 3 1/2 years ago.  Man alive! I thought (and I'm not joking, I really thought that) I am so blessed and lucky to have had so many opportunities the past three to four years of my life.  So here is a photo tribute to the experiences, but more importantly, the people that helped make my life so much better these past three years.

October 2009: After a life-changing hike with Lori Lund (Miller, now) and Kasey Butler. I didn't realize that long-term effects that this hike would have on my life but I frequently think about the things we talked about and the lessons we learned on that hike.  I needed my friends at this hard time in my life and they were there for me.

December 2009: at Lindsey's Ugly Sweater Party. I wish I had a better copy of the lower picture, but I think it's lost to cyberspace. Lindsey has been my friend through thick and thin, close and far, writing and phone calls. 

December 2009: Doing "See no evil,  hear no evil, speak no evil" with Ben and Jacob.  My brothers probably don't realize how much they make my day brighter, but they do.  

April 2010: My first full day in France. Sometimes that doesn't even seem real.  I learned a lot about myself when I was there. It was a good soul-cleansing and goal fulfilling trip.

May 2010: I got to spend 6 weeks in France. WHAT!? How many people get to do that? 

October 2010: This was a great group of roommates. Funny to think that we're all (except Biva) married.  I love this picture because we actually look like we could be tall or average-height people. And we are so not.

February 2011: I loved working with these ladies at Freshman Academy/Mentoring, especially traveling to Atlanta, Georgia to present at the First-Year Experience Conference.

April 2011: My partner in crime, Amanda Leifson.  So so so glad that we went to DC as a graduation present to myself.

May 2011: Verdon & Amberlee Walker gave me hope that I would find someone to love and love me back.  Verdon was one of my best friends for two years and I'm so glad that he's pursing his goals with Amberlee at his side.

August 2011: Taking engagement pictures.  Cody has changed my life and brought more happiness and laughter into my life than I deserve, but that I need.  Crazy that it has been two years.

January 2012: Parents. What would I do without them?

June 2013: My nephew, Westley.  That child is the reason I've seen my sister and brother-in-law so much the past year and a half (just kidding, sort of...haha).  I love this kid so much!

Even though life is hard, so hard, sometimes, at least I have good people around me who love me and whom I love.  I don't feel like the most faith-filled person right now, but I know I'm being supported by the faith of those stronger than I am right now. Thank you.

and Merry Christmas!

Gratitude

I feel like I'm always trying to find things for which to be grateful.  I know November is a natural time for Americans to think about gratitude because of Thanksgiving. I'm sure that other months are months of "Thanksgiving" in other cultures.

Here's a short list. I hope to add some longer posts about specific things that I am grateful for in the coming weeks:

1. the Gospel of Jesus Christ
2. my husband, Cody
3. the restored church of Jesus Christ (the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints)
4. family
5. prophets, seers, and revelators today
6. books
7. library cards
8. chocolate
9. friends
10. letters
11. my mom and dad, specifically
12. Lindsey, specifically
13. carpools
14. airplanes
15. cameras
16. notebooks and pens
17. literacy
18. music
19. patient people
20. knowledge
21. Shakespeare
22. Dr. Seuss
23. Yo Yo Ma
24. blue things
25. warm blankets
26. colors
27. food
28. being able to cook
29. running water
30. indoor plumbing
31. indoor heating and cooling
32. a car
33. my job
34. Cody's job
35. that I live in the United States 
36. that I grew up in middle-class America so that I'm blessed with opportunities beyond many in the world
37. our local and national leaders
38. good people that have the desire to run for/be president/Senate/House of Representatives/Governor/etc. and who mostly are all just trying to do their best, so that I don't ever have to feel like I need to
39. scientists
40. iPods
41. running shoes
42. socks
43. my nephew who is the cutest
44. my brothers and sisters (counting in-laws, too)
45. American history
46. having gone to BYU and taken so many different classes
47. prayer
48. perspective
49. fall
50. that I'm not allergic to any foods or medicines

"Way to break your bow"

Yesterday I got my 7th notification that I had done a great job in the interview and it was really hard deciding, but they've decided to give the position to someone else.  I was a bit disappointed and a little discouraged--what am I doing wrong? Am I answering the questions wrong? Am I just not supposed to get a job? Is this just supposed to be hard for me?

That is the vein of thought I was in around 2pm yesterday when Cody came home from work and I apologize for that--I wouldn't want to be around that kind of thinking.  But thankfully, shortly thereafter, Cody and I read 1 Nephi 16.  Now, whenever I read 1 Nephi 16 and get to the part about Nephi breaking his bow, I always think of seminary and Mike Davis giving the commentary from Laman and Lemuel, "Way to break your bow, Nephi!"  It still makes me smile.

Yet this time reading through chapter 16, Cody helped me see how my situation right now totally applies to that chapter--I need to not murmur, be ready to make a new bow (even when my precious steel one breaks), go to others for help and guidance, be faithful and diligent and give heed to the words of the Lord found in the scriptures and modern revelation, etc.  That was the perfect start for me to rise above my discouragement and become hopeful again.  No, it isn't easy; but after Nephi and his family struggled in this chapter, they found Bountiful and had rest for a little bit before going on to their next adventure.  The same could be true for me.

Plus, I got two letters in the mail yesterday which made me so happy, especially since one of them has been a long awaited letter from Lindsey Herde!  And she was inspired and included this quote at the end of her letter, "Progress is any movement toward peaceful acceptance of whatever the future may hold.  Working on things we can change, whether in personal or professional life, rather than concentrating and obsessing about those we can't, builds self worth and fosters hope" (August 2008, Ensign, "Single and Steadfast: Lessons in Hope). Thank you, Lindsey!

Lindsey, Lori & Sam

I received three letters today: Lindsey Herde, Lori Lund and Sam Bhagwat. I just sent Lindsey and Lori letters this morning too so that was pretty fun to get their letters this evening. And Sam sent his letter probably a month and a half ago.  It was SO great getting his letter. He sent pictures and he'll be coming home December 27 and I go home December 28 so we'll be able to see each other before he leaves for Stanford and I go back to BYU. YAY!!

Tomorrow is the 6 months left for Jamon anniversary and the 1 year left for Lindsey anniversary. Of course I won't tell either of them that I am counting down (sorta) the months they have left because that isn't what they should be focusing on.  Goodness I love my missionary friends. I am so blessed to have them.

I am so blessed to have such wonderful friends in general. I love Lindsey so so much! She is just always constantly being an answer to prayers. And Lori is just fabulous! And Sam, Sam is Sam. :) I can't believe I'll get to see them all soon!

Day 15: A not-so-related-to-Paris post

My best friend in the whole world reported to the MTC today. It probably seems a little silly that I say I'm going to miss her because it isn't like I've been her roommate the past two years that she's been at BYU or that we've had classes together or been in the same ward. In essence, we haven't seen each other every day, we haven't talked every day, yet why do I say I'm going to miss her so much?

It's like I told Jamon, "I've loved our spontaneous phone calls or texts or when we meet up. She truly is one of those forever friends, a thought that helps me as I realize that I won't be able to call or text or meet up with her for the next 18 months. Also, we've already gone through the drill of writing each other for years on end, so we know we can do that. :)"

It's that ability to call her up or stop over at her apartment or send her a text that has been so wonderful these past three years that I've been at BYU. It's also a strange sensation for me to know that she's going to be a missionary because she and I have talked about it for so long. I kind of feel like Anne Shirley in Anne of Avonlea when Diana Barry is going to get married and Anne knows that it's good and that Diana will be happy but it's also strange because she and Diana had talked about finding their "true loves" since they were little...and then Diana found her's. Linds and I have talked about missions for a long time, and now she's going on a mission.

I truly am extremely excited for Lindsey. She and I are both on different adventures, growing up a little bit, and yet we both know that when she and I meet again after her mission, it'll be as though no time has passed between us. That's how it's always been. Even if Lindsey didn't write me once on her mission, I know that we would still be able to talk about everything and anything when we see each other again.

So that's my ode to Lindsey. :)