4 Years

I was in high school for four years. I was in college for four years. I taught at Barnett Elementary for four years.  Four years seems to be my time range until big changes happen and I have to say a lot of good byes to people.

During these last four years that I've been a teacher at Barnett, I got married

I taught fifth grade for two years and third grade for two years, my nephew was born, I lived in Washington DC for a summer












Cody graduated from BYU


I cooked my first turkey, I got pregnant twice, I lived in three different apartments, I've been to California three times and Michigan twice, I've grown out my hair twice and cut it shorter twice, I started work on my Masters in Education (and should finish it soon), I was in a car accident, two of my great-grandmas died, my grandpa passed away,












I gave birth to Calvin, I took two months of maternity leave,  and now...

now I leave for a new adventure in Maryland.

I'm really going to miss all of my friends at Barnett and the students that I taught.  However, thank goodness for Facebook and email so we can keep in contact.

I can't believe it's here. The beginning of the end of our time in Provo.

I chose a great sub!

The past seven weeks that I've been on maternity leave, I've followed the emails between my sub and one of my student's parents.  This student and I didn't have a bad relationship, but he was a great self-distractor and distractor to his friends, so I would work with him a lot on appropriate behavior, etc.  When he did well, I let him know, but I think that our "let's work on this" conversations outnumbered the "you did great" conversations and he didn't feel like he was up to the task of managing his own behavior.

Now, back to the emails I've been tracking for seven weeks: My sub has helped this kid and his parent feel success. I've read many emails of thanks from this parent to my sub.

And I'll be honest, my first gut-wrenching emotion is that I'm a lousy teacher and she's better than I am.

But then I realize: I CHOSE A GREAT SUB! I chose a sub that has the energy to do what I physically and emotionally couldn't handle my last weeks of being pregnant. I chose a sub who finds creative ways to motivate students to change their behavior.  I chose a wonderful teacher to be with my class of third graders so I wouldn't need to worry about them or their learning while I'm home. She is better than me at certain things because she's a different person with different strengths. And she was just the person that student needed to help change his behavior, not me.

When plans can't translate to reality

I've been making some stinkin' awesome teaching plans lately.  Seriously, they're really good. They will increase engagement, learning, and fun.

Unfortunately, after lunch I just feel so tired...and the plans happen but they aren't as amazing as they would usually be because my energy is lower and I can't manage to muster enough of it to excite my little third graders to the level that is needed for my plans.

At least they'll be getting a fantastic long-term sub with energy when this baby comes in the next couple of months.  Then they can remember what it is like to have a teacher with energy to go along with the fun plans.

And when I come back after my six weeks, maybe I'll have some energy again...but probably not. Sorry kiddos, I'm doing my best! (But there's really only so much I can do when there's another human inside of me taking all of my energy.)

Second year in 3rd grade

Here I go....about to start my second year in third grade!  It's amazing the difference between fifth and third grade. However, just like I felt a lot more confident about my ability to teach and pace fifth grade my second year teaching fifth grade, I feel the same way about third grade this year.  I'm really excited to try out some new things, begin my rules and management plan right from the beginning of the year, and get to know my students and help them facilitate their learning.

Here are some pictures of my empty classroom. It won't stay empty for long since school starts tomorrow!

Back counter

Classroom library and outside door

Carpet area and word wall

Part of the carpet area and library

Computer area and word work materials

Whiteboard and display shelves

View from the front corner by the computers, look at the back of the room

View from the front, look at the back of the room

View from the door, look at the front of the room

View from the door, look at the back of the room

Three Assignments Left

This past month has been really busy for the first month of summer.  I started my Masters of Education program through SUU the Monday after school got out.  I had class all that week from 8-4, the following week, and the following week.  Since Cody was out of town that first week, I was able to get a lot of my assignments completed for that class that week (instead of taking all summer).  In fact, by the middle of the second week, I was completed with all my assignments for that first class I took (Research and Data).

Now, today, it's been a whole week since I've been in class and I only have three assignments left for my last two classes (Philosophy of Education & Educational Law).  I've already started my final paper for the Philosophy of Ed class and I need to participate in an online discussion, but then I'll be completed with that class. I'm hoping to check both of those assignments off my list by the end of this week.

My last two assignments for Philosophy of Education

My last class, Educational Law, has a long Topic Brief as the final paper. I'm a little nervous about starting that paper without getting feedback on my two smaller assignments that I've already submitted. I want to make sure that I'm using the correct legal language and that I don't sound too much like a teacher in these legal papers.

My last assignment for Educational Law

I've really enjoyed taking classes again. I'm already registered for my two classes for the fall--Organization of American Schools and my Thesis Writing class.  I'm hoping to start my thesis project early in the school year, but I know I'll need IRB approval since I'm working with humans...I hope that I'll be able to get my project approved quickly so I can start collecting data.

During a Scout Campout

What do I do during a Scout campout?

1. Start a new book
2. Clean my house
3. Take a bath in my newly cleaned tub
4. Give myself a pedicure
5. Make a video of my students' Sharing Day today
6. Write an article for my school's website about Sharing Day
7. Email students' parents
8. Almost start working on taxes but then realize I don't know what my husband's "occupation" is now that he isn't a student anymore...mine is easy: Teacher.
9. Read in bed until I go to sleep (probably 9:45 so I can pretend that I'm getting extra sleep before waking up at 6:40 on a Saturday for orchestra)
10. Try to get warm in bed

Tomorrow's adventures include orchestra practice, working on school stuff, going to see La Jetee at International Cinema, and then hoping Cody gets back (and cleaned up) in time to go to the Museum of Art at BYU to see the Sacred Gifts exhibit.

Three to four years in five minutes

After driving around in the snow this morning and discovering that the place (where I thought for sure I would find a small gift for Cody) didn't have it, I came home and began procrastination rituals.  What am I procrastinating?  Cleaning my house (because we didn't do that Saturday; instead we saw the Desolation of Smaug), grading, planning for school, class roles for Primary, working on Janeen's potatoes for dinner, and possibly making a buche de Noel (but I'm hoping to do that tonight with Cody).

During my successful procrastination, I listened to The Nutcracker, ate a banana and a candy sled, and made name tags for all the children in Primary.  Then I decided I would look up some information on the Internet which inevitably makes me sad. I thought maybe this time it wouldn't, but it did.  After trying to cheer myself by reading happy things and having that not work, I started wasting my life on Facebook. But this time it wasn't a waste.

I became sucked into looking at pictures and after five minutes I realized that I was looking at pictures from 3 1/2 years ago.  Man alive! I thought (and I'm not joking, I really thought that) I am so blessed and lucky to have had so many opportunities the past three to four years of my life.  So here is a photo tribute to the experiences, but more importantly, the people that helped make my life so much better these past three years.

October 2009: After a life-changing hike with Lori Lund (Miller, now) and Kasey Butler. I didn't realize that long-term effects that this hike would have on my life but I frequently think about the things we talked about and the lessons we learned on that hike.  I needed my friends at this hard time in my life and they were there for me.

December 2009: at Lindsey's Ugly Sweater Party. I wish I had a better copy of the lower picture, but I think it's lost to cyberspace. Lindsey has been my friend through thick and thin, close and far, writing and phone calls. 

December 2009: Doing "See no evil,  hear no evil, speak no evil" with Ben and Jacob.  My brothers probably don't realize how much they make my day brighter, but they do.  

April 2010: My first full day in France. Sometimes that doesn't even seem real.  I learned a lot about myself when I was there. It was a good soul-cleansing and goal fulfilling trip.

May 2010: I got to spend 6 weeks in France. WHAT!? How many people get to do that? 

October 2010: This was a great group of roommates. Funny to think that we're all (except Biva) married.  I love this picture because we actually look like we could be tall or average-height people. And we are so not.

February 2011: I loved working with these ladies at Freshman Academy/Mentoring, especially traveling to Atlanta, Georgia to present at the First-Year Experience Conference.

April 2011: My partner in crime, Amanda Leifson.  So so so glad that we went to DC as a graduation present to myself.

May 2011: Verdon & Amberlee Walker gave me hope that I would find someone to love and love me back.  Verdon was one of my best friends for two years and I'm so glad that he's pursing his goals with Amberlee at his side.

August 2011: Taking engagement pictures.  Cody has changed my life and brought more happiness and laughter into my life than I deserve, but that I need.  Crazy that it has been two years.

January 2012: Parents. What would I do without them?

June 2013: My nephew, Westley.  That child is the reason I've seen my sister and brother-in-law so much the past year and a half (just kidding, sort of...haha).  I love this kid so much!

Even though life is hard, so hard, sometimes, at least I have good people around me who love me and whom I love.  I don't feel like the most faith-filled person right now, but I know I'm being supported by the faith of those stronger than I am right now. Thank you.

and Merry Christmas!

Almost a month...

Well, this has been the longest hiatus with posting on my blog for the past six months. It's kind of weird to think that seven months ago I started that special diet to see if any of the food I was eating was a trigger for headaches. It's even more weird to think that five months ago I wrote my first blog post from DC (followed by many, many more). And then school started and my blogging took a backseat to figuring out how to be a third grade teacher, how to be a teacher, and how to balance my work life, personal life, and church life.

Maybe life will slow down, but probably not.

Today has been kind of a hard day. I've been really worried about someone that I care about so much all day. I'm not sure exactly what is going on with her and her life, but I know that it isn't what was planned and if it happened to me I would be crying buckets all day.  Like I said, I don't know exactly what is going on, but the worrying and praying and trying to be hopeful for her all day, has been a growing feeling throughout the day.  I wish I could do more for her than just think about her and pray for her, but I can't.  I've made myself available to talk but probably everyone wants to talk to her right now and that can get old and annoying.  Thankfully I know she has a great family that is supporting her right now and that Heavenly Father is right there with her giving her the strength she needs to make any tough decisions.

...

Other than today though, I've had a good week.  I voted on Tuesday for mayor and a city-council Member. I love feeling and knowing that I am participating in the great American experiment when I vote, even when it is in "small" elections like for mayor. These are our leaders that impact the exact place where we live! Why wouldn't we vote for "lesser" positions like mayor and city-council?

Proof! I have the "I voted!" sticker

Last week was Halloween and Cody and I dressed up as Wreck-it-Ralph and Vanellope Von Schweetz.

I'm starting to get into the groove of third grade, but I do still miss teaching fifth grade social studies. I'm trying to follow Jane Eyre's advice when she becomes the teacher to those poor, country-folk--to put aside her fine accomplishments because she knows they will keep.  I know that my love for American History will keep. I'll still find ways to incorporate it a little bit in my class (still not the same!), but that knowledge and that love will "keep."

Also, I got my first flu shot (that I can remember; I maybe got one when I was a baby) today. I figured I should just bite the bullet, get it and not try to test my luck that I won't get it this year. I've been blessed with extraordinarily good health, but I don't want to let getting sick mess up my Thanksgiving or Christmas plans (after that? Sure why not? haha).

Counting blessings

1. I went out for a run tonight and ended up running 4.67 miles with little problem (my knees started getting sore near the end).

2. A friend's third grade class is going to be pen pals with my third grade class (talk about having a motivation to write!).

3. I have the next two weeks planned for school (except for math...)!

4. We had pizza for dinner and I love pizza.

5. I'm doing benchmarks with my students tomorrow which means that I get to meet with every student individually and listen to them read. I love that!

6. I get to go to the Relief Society meeting with my sister in three weeks.

7. Cody and I will be getting together with some of our friends on Saturday for dinner or lunch and going to the temple.

8. I slept really well last night.

9. I'm feeling sort of organized with my new calling at church (Primary secretary--Primary is the children's organization in the LDS church for those who don't know), which is saying a lot since that is basically all that my calling means I need to be.

10. Beautiful sunset tonight that I got to watch appear as I went on my run.

11.  Thinking about how one of these days (soon...) I'll write about how I'm in a community orchestra and read a fantastic book that I think about all the time now.

The Honeymoon is Over

I hate to say that it's over when it's only been one week.

But...

It's over.

Today was the first day that I left school with a headache caused by the noise of my students and not because of being inept and losing my water bottle.  I know partly it was my students rambunctious natures, they're only 8 and 9, after all. However, I know the larger reason was me. I came to school feeling tired and while the morning was fantastic--they read for 12 minutes and then 8 minutes with it completely quiet, everyone participated the whole time during keyboarding, and everyone was engaged when we learned about sentences.  However, after lunch (which I wasn't too excited about today; it was a last minute lunch consisting of a tomato sandwich, cashews, a peach, and some pumpkin seeds that I didn't even eat), I started the beginning of my crazy, chaotic afternoon.

How?

Easy. I didn't state all of my expectations clearly and explicitly.  Specifically: I forgot to tell them what to do when they finished their math quiz, making their brown frosting, and read-aloud.  Ugh. I won't ever need this reminder again, though I probably will still make the same mistake. When I do, then I'll think, "Why didn't I just tell them what I wanted?! I thought I learned this the first week of school!?" And I have.

First day of third grade

Today was my first day as a third grade teacher.  It went a lot better than I was expecting.  I'm still really tired, so I'm not going to write much today.

View from the front of the room; after math, the desks changed from two rows of 13 and 12 to five groups of five 

Another view from the front

View of my computer/desk

Close-up of where my I Can statements will be displayed throughout the year

View of the front of my room

View of my desk & calendar 

View of my word wall and carpet area

Ten days

It's been ten days since Cody and I returned from DC.  In those ten days we have attended two weddings, one two-day graduation, I have had math training, back-to-school faculty welcome meeting, district meeting, third grade team meeting, and Open House.  School starts tomorrow.

Needless to say, I am exhausted. I was doing fine until today but man, I forgot how wiped out I get the first week of school.

Now, to go in order: Cody's younger sister got married last Wednesday.  We attended their sealing in the Salt Lake City, Utah temple...

Cody and me standing next to Cody's sister and her new husband, just outside the doors of the Salt Lake Temple

then went from there to help set up her reception at Wheeler Historic Farm in Cottonwood Heights area. After about four and a half hours of set-up, we attended the actual reception. Three hours later, we helped take it all down in an hour and a half. Also a funny thing that I thought of that day as I was getting my picture taken with the bride and all of her bridesmaids (of which I was one), is that I was the only one with my hair up. All the rest of the girls had their hair down. The funny thing is that, it used to be that after a certain age, it was a "privilege" to have your hair pinned up to show that you were a woman. Now it seems to be the opposite--have your hair down and show how beautiful it is.  I'm not complaining or judging (I have my hair down half the time, too), I just wonder when that switch in the female psyche happened in the Western world.

Then on Thursday, I went to math training and saw most of the faculty again for the first time in three months.  But the more important events of the day were that Cody's day one of graduation occurred. He was given the official "you're graduated" from President Cecil Samuelson, president of BYU. His parents, brothers, and us went to dinner that evening at Sizzler (Cody's choice; my family's traditions have rubbed off on him).

Cody and me after Thursday's ceremony

The next day, me, all of Cody's grandparents (except Papa John), plus his parents and brothers, and his cousin Shane, attended his college's graduation ceremony.  This was followed up by lunch at DP Cheesesteak's (another suggestion by Cody and it was a winner!). We were really happy that so many family members were able to be there for it, especially since most family members won't be able to make it to his higher-degree graduations.

Cody's parents, brothers, and me after graduation

Monday was my back-to-school faculty meeting and district meeting.  Yesterday was my third grade team meeting. And today was Open House.  I'll take some pictures of my classroom before school starts tomorrow.  I like it. It doesn't have an overt decoration theme, but it's simple, uncluttered, and open which I really like.

I miss DC. But I'm happy to be back.  I hope our paths really do take us back out there in the near future, like we hope they will.

Sick today

I've been fighting a cold since Monday. Today I decided I would actually try to get better rather than pushing myself through school.  It always amazes me and annoys me every time I'm sick and realize, "I can't just not go in, I have to do something so that my kids can still learn." I'm sure other jobs require some planning or something if you can't go into the office but for teachers you HAVE to have plans for a sub even if you're throwing up with the flu. 

In some ways (especially on sick days) it's incredibly annoying.

On other days it's kind of neat to think that I am, for those kids in my class, indispensable. Or at least my training, education, and the presence of a competent adult in the classroom.  But if I didn't write sub plans most subs wouldn't know what to do exactly and my students would try to help but probably wouldn't learn much that day.

Bottom line is: I don't like being sick. I don't like writing sub plans. BUT, I do like knowing that I am an integral part of my students' education.

Tired...

The past week has been really good. School started, I have a great class, I've been running regularly, Cody has been back, and Cody's family was here to drop off two of Cody's siblings for school at BYU.  It was great spending time with them.

Yet, even though the week has been good, man I have been tired today. So tired! I woke up tired, I guess I shook off a lot of the tiredness when I was at school, but as soon as school ended--BAM!--hit with the tired again.

Also, the last count for the number of students interested in being in French Club (after school program I'm in charge of) was 44.  FORTY-FOUR STUDENTS!! Aghhh! Hopefully some kind BYU students will want to come volunteer and help me out.

Planning for school...

I've been doing a lot of planning and creating the past few weeks. I've made a class website and gave my class blog a facelift and a new purpose. I'm really excited by it. I think it looks pretty good, too.


I've also been thinking about how I want to start out the school year to help alleviate some of the issues I had this past year (i.e. students who don't know how to solve their own silly drama problems), introduce the different subject areas, incorporate art history/criticism/creation into the school year, French Club plans, finding cool ways to have current events be a part in my classroom, teaching about the election process, etc etc etc.




I've been looking into Whole Brain Teaching more in depth (since I have more time this summer to plan than last summer).  I've been trying to think of ways to mesh it with also having my students come up with rules...I haven't come up with a great way to do that yet, but I'm sure that I'll come up with something as I'm drifting off to sleep.




I really love teaching.  I feel like that's one of the few things that I can really feel competent about. I like a bunch of small things, but I feel like I can teach kids and interact with kids (especially awesome 5th graders) really well.  At least Cody can keep me informed on the rest of the world or else I would be stuck in the 5th grade curriculum all the time. Though, if I had to be stuck in any one grade, I think I would always pick 5th grade.  It's way too fun.


Oh yeah, I started rereading Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone...I was waiting for Cody to finish The Alloy of Law by Brandon Sanderson and needed to do something.

I started again...

It's been a year and I decided I won't have the excuse of completely falling in love with Cody to distract me this summer.  Distracted from what?  From the story I started 11 years ago. ELEVEN YEARS!! What is wrong with me?

And want to know the best part? I still laugh at my lame jokes in the story.  I was able to breeze through the first part of my story today--only took me an hour and fifteen minutes. That's probably because I'd started to go through it last May/June. It'll get harder as I keep going.  Parts 3-5 I haven't looked at since August 2008. TWO THOUSAND AND EIGHT, people!  That's four years! That's a really long time to get distracted with school and dating and working and graduating and finding a job and dating the best man ever and then getting engaged to him (and then marrying him).

Four years.  Eleven years.  Who knows, maybe I'll actually finish going through it for real this summer and if I have any guts left in me after that endeavor, could I really go after my goal of trying to get it published? We'll see.  Kinda scares me and makes me want to write with a penname so that no one can trace my silliness to me but then another part of me thinks that I should be proud of it and not be scared.  Plus, one of the reasons I used to play around with pen names was so that if I got it published when I was still unmarried, it could still be traced to me (dumb, I know).  But I'll be Beth Knudsen forever and I don't need to worry about that.

Oh yeah, another thing I started again: running.  I mean I have been running (or doing yogalates--yoga and pilates) since the new year started, but I ran three times this week! The first two days kicked my butt, but the last day, that was great.

I've also started planning again for school next year (I'm such a nerd) because I want to do so much better at teaching math next year, especially with the new math standards for fifth grade.  I did an alright job and my students learned this past year but I know I can do so much better and I'm really looking forward to it.

Update: I'm married and school's almost over

I haven't written since November. Shame on me.

Old news: I'm married. It's great!

Newish news: I have a nephew! He's super duper cute.

New news: Only a few more weeks left of school. That means that my first year of teaching is almost over.

Newest news: I'm doing this cool science thing in the summer where I get to travel in the Great Basin and be a scientist and get paid at the end of the year. It's going to be really fun and hard and tiring and fun.

Bad news: I won't have a lot of contact with the outside world because I'll be in the middle of nowhere looking at rocks.

Not new news: I don't write in here much anyway (because I write on my blog for school everyday) so the fact that I'll be cut off from all civilization during my summer science excursion won't be different for anyone who might happen to frequent this blog once in a blue moon now that I don't write regularly.

In other news: I'm tired but I get to be at the BYU library when it closes tonight. Yipee!

Reminder: Beth, you do make a difference. :)

After a long, but not bad, week of school, I was definitely looking forward to today. Friday. The end of the week. The day after the wax museum.

And today was great!

I love my students.  Even though I had to give two kids think-times, I was able to give one of them a brag note later because he repented and changed and wanted to help out.  My students helped me clean up. They were also all excited about making a decoration for Cody and my reception in December.  They are so cute and I love them.

Plus, we had a discussion about using the bathroom responsibly and how we should only go to the bathroom when we need to, not to go talk with our buddies.  That was fun. :)  Also, we did a talking circle saying one thing we were grateful for and one of my girls spelled out: B-O-Y-S and then blushed and giggled.  And the boy sitting next to her said, "Bows?" Funny.

And another one of my students said that she was grateful for me and that I'm nice because she was worried that I would be mean because she didn't know me.  I'm glad she likes me because I like her to. 

I'm grateful that most of the time I can honestly respect my students.

Never again (I wish)

My first Halloween at school as the real teacher in charge was crazy.  Why is Halloween every year? And why does it revolve around candy for children? Do people know how crazy kids get with a bunch of sugar in their system?  Halloween was my favorite holiday kindergarten through 3rd grade--what was I thinking?

A lot has been happening

In the past couple weeks I've gotten my wedding dress back from being altered, we've started ordering announcements, and Cody and I were able to buy a contract for a place to live after we're married.  Coupled with that the end of the term is this week, which means my first batch of report cards, make-up work, a field trip yesterday, a new term starts Monday, and I'm thinking of things I want to change for term 2 and wondering if it will all work out. Wondering if I'll ever stop feeling like I'm incompetent.  Wondering if I'll ever feel like I'm actually on top of the game and not just flying by the seat of my pants, especially with employee obligations--meetings, trainings, reporting, assessing, etc. 

I feel bad that Cody has to hear all my worries and complaints and discouragement from day to day.  Thankfully things have been a little brighter on my end of things lately.  The term is ending so I do get a fresh start of sorts next week.  It's less than two months now until the wedding.  We're supposed to get married so eventually both of our contracts will sell.  The bridal showers are all set.  And at least my students like me. And I have Cody. :)  He makes everything better.