In the past couple weeks I've gotten my wedding dress back from being altered, we've started ordering announcements, and Cody and I were able to buy a contract for a place to live after we're married. Coupled with that the end of the term is this week, which means my first batch of report cards, make-up work, a field trip yesterday, a new term starts Monday, and I'm thinking of things I want to change for term 2 and wondering if it will all work out. Wondering if I'll ever stop feeling like I'm incompetent. Wondering if I'll ever feel like I'm actually on top of the game and not just flying by the seat of my pants, especially with employee obligations--meetings, trainings, reporting, assessing, etc.
I feel bad that Cody has to hear all my worries and complaints and discouragement from day to day. Thankfully things have been a little brighter on my end of things lately. The term is ending so I do get a fresh start of sorts next week. It's less than two months now until the wedding. We're supposed to get married so eventually both of our contracts will sell. The bridal showers are all set. And at least my students like me. And I have Cody. :) He makes everything better.
*hugs* Something I've noticed is that Satan works hard on me when something amazing is about to happen. The feelings of incompetence, greater temptations, etc. He works really hard on engaged people because he will never have the joys of an eternal family. He works really hard on me when I am pregnant because he will never have a body. March and September are always hard for me because General Conference is coming up. Once I recognize it, I can fight against the real cause of my stresses and troubles. Pres. Uchtdorf's talk at the RS broadcast has been sustaining me amazingly, and even though I find myself rushing to the finish for Halloween costumes again, I'm not stressed out like I would have been before that talk, and can actually enjoy the 2-year old on my lap watching the Woody Movie for the millionth time while my projects are still unfinished.
ReplyDeleteI'm so excited for you, Bethy!